Basically, I have two tables PARENT and CHILD in an external database. Table CHILD contains a foreign key to table PARENT. Each table maps to a corresponding custom record type in NetSuite. I want to import tables PARENT and CHILD into NetSuite so that record CHILD contains a reference to record PARENT. I've already imported PARENT into NetSuite and included it's primary key in the externalid field. The CHILD record type in NetSuite has a list/record field (record type: PARENT). I now want to import CHILD with its link to PARENT.

and you did this stuff?:

To establish a parent-child relationship between records, you can do one of the following:

    Create a custom child record. To do this, create a custom record as described in Creating Custom Record Types but define at least one custom field as a child record.

    Fields are defined as a child record by checking the Record is Parent box and then selecting a Parent Subtab in the Display subtab of the record.

    Create a custom field, attach a built-in field, and then define the field as a child record. For more information on attaching built-in records, see Creating Built-in Child Records.

yeah I have the relationship established

so for the field that references the parent, you're using the external ID of the parent, and you changed the input value on the field mapping to accept extID instead of intID or Name?

I have the externalid reference to the parent because the externalid of the parent is the primary key of the parent record in the original database

sure I get that, but did you change the reference type on the parent reference field? On the import? {probably a no brainer, but checking the easy stuff first]