at the very least when i update the file it should update the script record

If the scriptrecord+deployment already exist, you should be able to just update the file. Although there has been a bug for some accounts that the changes doesnt update the behaviour. Probably due to some cacheing issue on netsuites part. Don't know if this still occurs though.

yes this is the issue i have

If you look at the file in Netsuite, is it the new version? Then probably yes.

You must open the file in edit mode from the filecabinet and re-submit the file in order to invalidate the cache in these cases.

so pushing the file in the CLI won't auto-update the script record seems a little backwards

Ya it's stupid. It doesn't always have this problem. It's an intermittent bug...

I updated the file 4 x today 3/4 it auto updated