So, when I'm just chillin with my phone and I accidentally almost drop it, I catch it with a squeeze and Assistant pops up in my face like

Yo, you call me?

and I'm like

Go away Assistant, I accidentally grabbed you too hard.

and she's like

Aight.

and goes away. Then when I'm hanging out on the couch and I want to ask Assistant something, I squeeze the phone.... crickets... I squeeze harder.... crickets.... I squeeze harder and then Assistant picks up and she's like

Whatchew want???

and I'm like

Shit, I forgot, I had to concentrate so hard on squeezing the piss out of my phone.